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LightHearted Musings - We Belong to Each Other
Posted by Dr. Molly Roberts on September 19th, 2008
If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.
–Mother Teresa
When I was younger, I really thought I wasn’t going to live past the age of 30, and I am amazed at how many others of my age had the same thought. You have to wonder what that kind of impending doom does to the human psyche.
I and others like me were convinced that we would all be blown up in a nuclear storm long before we would have a chance to grow old and die peacefully in our beds. This was during the 60’s and 70’s, when we were full force into our Cold War with the Soviet Union, when we were told that this “Evil Empire” on the other side of the world was just itching to blow us off the face of the planet. We were told that we were the good guys and they were the bad ones, that they couldn’t be trusted, had no morals or conscience, and wanted only war and destruction.
There was much talk of impending nuclear war and of our leaders having their fingers on the trigger of worldwide destruction. We saw what a nuclear blast did to cities and people in those famous newsreels, we saw movies depicting people who went crazy and set off a nuclear ping pong match that nobody could possibly win, we heard in great detail what a nuclear winter would be like, we saw the news where the latest conflict was splashed all over the headlines whipping up fear, we heard the concern in our parents voices when they discussed these issues – our impending death was clearly right around the corner. And I always knew, even as a young child, that our “Duck and Cover” nuclear blast drills at school wouldn’t save anyone. How is a cafeteria table going to guard me from a radioactive blast? Might as well face it head on and get the dying over with quickly. Those were my 10-year-old thoughts, and 10-year-olds all over the country were right there with me on the firing line.
Well go figure, here I still am, now well into the second half of my 40’s, still intact and free of radioactive contaminants. The dreaded “Big Bang” didn’t happen, I grew up, got well past 30 (!), fell in love, got married, had children, and now our first child has just gone off to college. All my body parts are intact and my kids have no idea what “Duck and Cover” might refer to.
We are now friends with the Russians, and (who knew!) we found that they were just like us, with all the same fears, stresses, joys, loves, and hopes that we have. Sure, there are some bad guys in the bunch, but we have some of those ourselves. The majority of them are good, kind, decent, loving people who want peace and harmony in their lives. They had been hearing the same demonizing words about us, and to them, we were the “Evil Empire.” All it took was for us to talk with them for a while to find out how much we have in common.
Now I hear some of the same talk about the newest in a long line of bad guys, those in the Middle East. I hear that they are just itching to blow us off the face of the planet, how they have no conscience, honor or sense of right and wrong. Those in the Middle East are hearing the same words said about us, and to them, we are the “Evil Empire.” I hear our leaders demonizing those from the Middle East, and yet when I meet them, (go figure!) they are kind, peace loving, want only the best for their families and want to do right by the world. Some of them are bad guys, but then so are some of us. Just like our new friends, the Russians, and just like us, most of them want peace and harmony in their lives as well.
I see us all as more similar than different on so many levels. As a physician, I know that 99.4% of our DNA is the same in every human being on this planet. I see that we all come from a common ancestral line and as such, we are all brothers and sisters in our humanity. We are a family, dysfunctional though we may be at times, but one worth working on to find more peace in our interactions. Just like family, we are all connected, and our countries can’t harm one another without harming themselves in the process. The same goes for us individually, something that is important to consider the next time you want to yell at your spouse or cut someone off in traffic.
On an emotional level, our needs for safety, physical comfort, love, fellowship, fulfillment, and understanding are common to all. So said the old woman in Egypt who asked my daughter to tell those in America that she wasn’t evil at all, that most people in the Middle East want to live their lives happily and peacefully just like everyone else. So said those people in our group workshops who commented on how surprised they were that another group member was so similar to them when all they saw at first were their differences.
On a more cosmic level, I see us all as children of God, all with that spark of the Divine within us. It is that Divine essence that unites us, makes us all One in a far deeper sense than those words can adequately convey. We are all connected to each other and we all have our parts to play in this great collective World that we share. Violence toward one person on this planet energetically creates a ripple effect that harms everyone else. Harming another because they are different is just as irrational as if I cut off my arm simply because it was different from my leg. This recognition of our divine unity is what we need to tap into in order to honor and cherish each other and bring peace to our world.
So much of our collective time over the past millennia has been spent in figuring out how we are different and then attacking that difference in others. It has been the basis of all our wars and conflict. I wonder how much better our world and our future would be if we all just stopped with the demonizing, with the “us vs. them” mentality, with the thought that those “others” couldn’t possibly be like us. I am so dearly ready to hang up the concept of “Evil Empire.” I am so ready to focus on what we all have in common and to highlight our similarities instead of our differences. I am so ready for my children and my children’s children to assume that they will grow old and die peacefully in their beds. I am so, so ready for a more peaceful world.
If you have been overwhelmed by the events of the world, then consider bringing these words into your heart and letting them roll around in there for a while. I know I am not alone in this peaceful wish, and if you are a compatriot in these personal and cosmic hopes and dreams, then please share your thoughts here.
Dr. Molly
You’ve touched into a vital stream in the collective consciousness of this vital moment in time, Molly.
See extensions of your awarenesses in
Beyond the Matrix - The Cosmic Formula of Creation
by Jean-Claude Koven
“Most people are other people,”
Oscar Wilde once remarked. “Their thoughts are someone else?s
opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.” As he
so wryly observed, the vast majority of us are not who we?ve been
pretending to be, and the lives we?ve been living until now are
molded according to rules and values that are not our own. Most of
humanity is stuck in someone else?s discarded chewing gum and has
yet to break free.
Unless you have been brave enough to forsake this trap, here is
your likely portrait: your religious convictions are those of your
parents or community; you root for your hometown sports teams; your
political allegiances conform to the party system that society
offers; you are an avid observer of the cultural pageantry, like the
Super Bowl and the Oscars; your holidays are the standard ones, such
as Christmas, New Year?s Eve, and Independence Day; you look to your
political and religious leaders for guidance and protection; you
feel driven to succeed?to make more money, to live a better life.
These are worthy and desirable choices that hold families and
societies together. They make you who you are, you might argue.
True, but only if you are content with admiring the wrapping and
never looking inside the box. If you dared to look, you?d discover
how these basic thoughts originate in a fundamental belief formed
during the first years of your life: that survival depends on
obeying the rules. Children typically bend their perceptions and
interpretations of reality to match those of their parents and
others who care for them. They find clever ways to please in order
to receive attention and belong. As they grow up, the people and
issues may change over time, but the initial patterns of conformity
remain deeply ingrained in the subconscious.
Becoming Someone Else. The price for surrendering to consensus is
steep. It is nothing less than the loss of individuality and
curiosity. Without these two magnificent attributes, you disengage
from the grandness of the creation and implode into the holographic
illusion humans have come to call reality. You become one of Oscar
Wilde?s other people, thinking someone else?s opinions and assuming
they are your own…
More: http://alternativesmagazine.com/36/koven.html
Comment by Daniel Benor, MD — September 22, 2008 @ 7:21 am
Beautifully said, Dr. Molly! I enjoy your LightHearted Musings each week…a nice way to start my Monday!
Comment by Mary Shomon — September 22, 2008 @ 9:42 am
Hi Dr. Molly,
I so agree with you. If we focused on how similar we really are and that we really are connected in so many ways, I think there would be more peace in the world.
Thanks for sharing,
Gina
Comment by Gina Rafkind — September 22, 2008 @ 11:01 am
Thanks Dr. Molly for your musings. While reading, I thought of a quote by Rick Warren, “Hurt people hurt people.” The first ‘hurt’ being an adjective and the second ‘hurt’ a verb. We are all so similar. Love & compassion is so necessary for ourselves as well as all our brothers and sisters around the world.
Comment by Lisa RP — September 23, 2008 @ 2:56 pm